Thursday, April 26, 2012

“Submitting” vs. “Submissive”


I’ve always had a bit of an issue w/ the idea of labeling myself “a submissive.”  Not that it bothers me… I just don’t find it entirely inaccurate.  Not that I’m a switch either.  I’m certainly no dominant, and I’m most definitely not a sadist!  I don’t want to hurt anybody, I don’t want to boss anybody around, and (as my Owner recently, again pointed out) I don’t generally do well when the planning is left up to me – tell me what you want done, and I’ll make it happen… but leave it up to me to choose the plan, and I tend to bog-down in indecision.  So, as far as the label goes, “submissive” works okay.  

And I am certainly a masochist and a bottom.  I like pain.  I also like being made helpless – having control taken from me.  I get hard every time I hear the “click” of the lock as my Owner locks me into my collar and I know that I am absolutely HERS.  


So that would make me “a sub,” right?  But here’s my thing…  When I play w/ a Top, and when it’s a good scene, often I will find myself in a submissive headspace… during that scene.  Now, this doesn’t always happen.  There are some skilled Tops whom I enjoy playing w/ that I never wind-up feeling submissive towards – our play is a purely S/m exchange w/o any D/s aspect at all.  Sometimes I even like interrogation play… so I can be very un-submissive, resist, talk back, and say, “fuck you.”  (I do not do interrogation play w/ my Owner – that just would sooooo not work.)  But many times I will play w/ somebody and they will put me into a yummy, warm submissive headspace… during that scene.  Then the scene ends, I snuggle and eat a cookie (doggie treat!), come back to earth… and the subspace gradually fades.

If you talk about me being “a submissive” (as a noun), it sounds like I’m just submissive in general – to just anybody… or to any Dom.  But… that hardly seems accurate, at least in my case.  There are many Doms that I respect but w/o feeling submissive towards.  Of course there are some Doms I don’t even respect, and a few that I wouldn’t cross the street to piss on if they were on fire… 

I think for me it makes more sense to talk about the “act of submission” as a verb.  Instead of “I’m a sub,” try “I submit.”  Or, better, “I submit to ___.”  This may be a temporary headspace (like when I play in a really yummy, hot scene and I get all weak in the knees and just want to collapse at your feet and lick your boots)… or it may be an ongoing D/s relationship like I have w/ my Owner and my Alpha Pup.  But those are the only two people I am submissive towards in a generalized, in-and-out-of-scene, ongoing way – not towards just any Dom who walks up.

And isn’t one of the classic beginning-Dominant mistakes to assume that you can issue orders to just any sub/bottom/boy around?  “Well, you’re a submissive, right!?”

“Dude, I submit… but not to you!”

“Well, you’re not a true submissive then.”

“Well, you are a true jackass.”

(Can you tell I’ve had this conversation before?)

And there’s the corresponding mistake for beginning-submissives: thinking you have to obey every self-identified “Master.”  So I think maybe the label is misleading… like, if you identify as “submissive” then you must be submissive toward whoever in some generalized way.  To my thinking (and I know my Owner agrees, b/c she’s told me so) my submission is worth more b/c I don’t submit to just anybody.  Ma’am used to frequently tell me, “Walk w/ your head held proud; I don’t want to see you lower your eyes to anybody but me.”  I guess now that’s: “…me and Loki.”  :)

Sunday, April 22, 2012

Save the Faeries!


No, it’s not about gay pride.  It’s about Atlanta Faerie Escape 2012!  It’s rather amusing… and you can VERY briefly see Shdwkitten and Alex.  (Look at the lower left of the screen when the narrator says “costuming.”)  Ma’am was anointed the “Best Dark Faerie” in 2010.



Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Bootbrush Interview

This is worth sharing and cross-posting.  Bootbrush talks about BDSM, scene names, pup play, gear fetishes, poly relationships... on this pod cast.  It's Good!  Go listen.
http://www.drdicksexadvice.com/2012/04/18/podcast-328/
And just in case you're as unobservant as I am, it took me a minute to find it, but the small "play" button is up near the top of the page.

Monday, April 16, 2012

What drew me to Puppy Play?

Last week, my Alpha Pup posed me w/ a question: What drew me to puppy play initially?  For him it was the gear.  Now, I like the gear… I love looking at pictures online of pups in hot leather and rubber get-ups.  I have a fetish for those materials just like a lot of us in this community do… and as a shout-out, let me say: if you have even a slight fetish about rubber gear (or pup play), you should get Bootbrush’s book of erotica, Assimilation.  It is uber-hot!  (There’s even one story about sex on a motorcycle which has always been a HUGE fantasy of mine.  I own the motorcycle, unfortunately I have no garage.  Wait a minute!  I know someone who has a garage…)

Oops! Where was I?  Oh, yeah.  While I do tend to get turned-on by the look, touch, and smell of leather, rubber, and lycra, that wasn’t actually what drew me to pup play to begin with.  This is evidenced pretty well by the fact that I’ve been doing pup play since 2005 and identified as a "pup" for almost as long, but I only bought my first tail last year and my first puppy hood this year.  Well… to be honest, I probably would have bought some gear sooner except for the fact that my Owner doesn’t like the hoods (she prefers to see my face) and she’s not a gear fetishist.  She’s okay w/ leather, rubber, and spandex… but they don’t often push her buttons.  My new puppy hood is somewhat of a concession – she’s indulging me, but she’s not crazy about it.

Now, if you count the leash and collar as pup gear… well, that, I admit, was probably where it first started.  Ever since I was a teen, I had fantasies of being led about on a leash, or chained-up by a collar.  And now, I have the coolest leash I know of – a long leash of heavy, brown leather.  It’s probably my favorite piece of gear (not counting Ma’am’s collar), and I LOVE to be paraded about on it.  Being led by the leash is one of my biggest turn-ons. 

However, lots of people in our community have fetishes about leashes and collars w/o being into puppy play, so I don’t think my gear fetish is really what drew me to pup play.  For me it started more as a spiritual interest.  I used to attend a Zen Center and sit in meditation about once a week.  I did that for… oh, I guess about two years.  That was like 2001-2002, I think.  Now, the goal of Zen meditation is to cultivate a state of “no mind” in which you experience reality directly w/o picking it apart w/ added analysis.  "When you chop wood, chop wood. When you carry water, carry water."  Sounds like it should be simple, but try and sit for 10 minutes w/o thinking any conscious, verbalize-able, thoughts… just experience things unfiltered w/o any mental “commentary.”  It’s pretty tough.  However, after practicing that for a couple of years, I found it fairly easy to drop into pup-space from the very first time I tried it.  I still use a lot of the same techniques: counting breaths or silently repeating mantras.  I use a Chinese Daoist mantra I learned many years ago (wu-tie-foo-may-lay), but it can be anything – you can repeat “Mary had a little lamb” in your head.  The purpose of the mantra is just to distract the frontal part of your brain – to make the words in your head stop.

After a couple of years at the Zen Center, I drifted out of the East and became interested in Neo-paganism and, in particular, Celtic shamanism.  The work of John & Caitlin Matthews was very important during this time (2002-2004), and I actually got to meet them at Mythic Journeys in 2004.  (If you know the origin of my name, Emrys, then you’ve got a solid clue to where I’m coming from.)  

Also important was the work of Stephen Larsen, who approached shamanism/transformation from a Jungian perspective… focused on play, masks, and role-playing games as tools for inner transformation… and I also got to meet Stephen Larsen at Mythic Journeys ’04. 

I guess one last piece of the puzzle for me was a long-standing interest in werewolves.  Not just an interest in, but, as I’ve previously written, even a fetish for.  I think werewolves are just fucking sexy!  That irresistible explosion of raw, primal energy…  Yum!

Somewhere at the intersection of a gear (leash) fetish + the meditative practice of “no mind” + Celtic shamanism (w/ its strong focus on totem animals) + an erotic interest in primal animal transformation and the canine/human hybrid… Pup Emrys was forged.

For me, becoming a canine isn’t just a game I play every now and then in the dungeon.  The Irish Wolfhound is my spirit animal – my totem.  This is who I am under the surface of my skin… and the hound is always there, 24/7… even if he’s sometimes deeper and other times closer to the surface.  Yes, it’s erotic – of course!  But it’s also spiritual for me.  But it’s also play (an important lesson I got from Stephen Larsen: that play and games can be deeply spiritual exercises… especially those that involve identity-transformation or role-play – theater, after all, began as a religious event).  So I’ll close w/ one more formula: sexual + spiritual + playful = pup play.

(And I can just hear Sir thinking to himself, "Ask a simple question...")

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Important Announcement!!!

Okay, so I’ve mentioned already that, much as I love CAPEX, my home club has felt a bit stale to me lately, and I’ve been looking for a change.  Mind you, CAPEX is a great group, but after 10 years of being there and volunteering almost every month I'm looking for some new experiences...  and particularly bothersome to me has been the lack of pup/boy energy around there, as it is a predominantly het, male-Top/fem-bottom group.  At first I thought maybe I was just looking for fellow pups to be around and soak-up some of their energy.  But then I soon found that the instinct to bond w/ a pack is greater than that.  After a couple of trips to visit some Georgia pups, I found I really would have liked to be accepted as a full member of a pack and not just a random pup who’s welcome to drop in now and again.

Problem was, to find a pack to properly belong to, I had a fairly specific set of requirements.
  • Given I am owned by, and devoted to, Shdwkitten, I’m not at all looking for a new Handler/Owner… so I was searching for an Alpha Pup who’s not, himself, looking to fully-collar a new submissive.
  • It seems that the pup-energy I’m searching for is a particularly (gay) male energy… which kind of further limits my search b/c it would have to be a pack that was comfortable w/ a “nominally straight” puppy who has a female Owner…
  • And (maybe most important of all) the Alpha would further have to be someone I feel a good chemistry with – someone I feel attracted to and submissive towards… which isn’t a whole lot of men for me.  I mean, I have many male friends who are skilled play-partners… but it’s different when you talk about being in an ongoing D/s (Alpha/beta) relationship w/ someone.
Right, so, on the one hand that describes a fairly narrow search parameter, does it not?  On the other hand… it also described this really cool Alpha Pup I already knew!

Let’s back up…  One year ago at Frolicon 2011, my lovely Owner arranges for me to have a play-date for my birthday w/ a certain puppy: Loki.  We’d seen him around at this-and-that con – never playing; never in pup-mode; just watching – and she’d been lusting after him for years.  LOL.  I never paid him too much attention, honestly… but, turns out, he was watching me.  He later told me that I was the first pup he saw doing pup-play in real life.  Last year, he caught me in pup-mode at Frolicon and gave me some great scritches as I loved up against him.  Ma’am saw him flogging somebody (Ah-ha; he’s a switch), and that gave her the brainstorm to approach Loki's Handler about having Loki give me my birthday beat-down.

It turned out to be one amazing scene!  I think from the first time we played there was just a great chemistry between us.  I’d been active in the lifestyle for 9 years at that point, and I’d played w/ some very expert Tops (Master Rorie, NCMaster, MasterZ… to drop a few names), but this scene immediately went into my top 4 or 5 of most memorable ever, and really it was just the simple fact that the chemistry between Loki and I was hot, hot, hot!  His play style is very similar to my Owner’s.  It’s very primal… w/ lots of hands-on contact, scratching, kissing, growling, licking, bighting, edging, chewing-on-nipples… *singing: these are a few of my favorite things*

It was only after the con that Ma’am located his blog and learned that he was fairly new to active BDSM play (less than a year) and VERY new to Topping.  I had no idea – after our scene together, I’d have told you he was a grand master.  It really just goes to prove that it’s not about expensive toys or technical skill (I’ve known some Tops who were technically very skilled and still as exciting to me as watching paint dry); it’s about the energy exchange and the chemistry between the players.

(By the way, Loki’s written very well about that Frolicon scene from his POV at: http://lokipup.blogspot.com/2011/04/frolicon.html and http://lokipup.blogspot.com/2011/05/frolicon-cont.html .  Go read.)

So, Loki and I exchange some emails now and then; he gets invited to our Tree-house parties but never makes it up; I check in on his blog every month or two just to see how he’s doing… but we don’t see one-another for almost a year.  Then, last month, Ma’am decides we’re going down to Atlanta to 1763’s Education Stations b/c she wants to see Andrew (who was doing knife play)… and then she surprises me w/ the news that we’re having dinner w/ Loki beforehand.  Yea!  *wags*

I get a great boost of energy from being around Sir Loki (he’s a Sir, now) and his delightful pup/boy, Tebow.  I talk Ma’am into letting me go see them again at Dominion a couple of weeks later… and a couple of weeks after that she sets-up a private play-date between Loki & I.

So… after we got back from this year’s Frolicon, Ma’am called Loki and asked him if he’d be interested in letting me join his pack and serve him as my Alpha Pup.  Fortunately she woke him up from a post-con nap, and he was so groggy that he didn’t quite know what he was saying, so he agreed.  *bounces up and down and runs in circles*

I am so proud to belong to Sir Loki’s pack.  Now I not only am the happy property of the wonderful, exciting, and oh-so-sexy Shdwkitten, as well as being the family puppy of my fantastic poly in-laws: CF and the Panda (wouldn’t that be a great title for an early-1980s TV show?), but I’m also fortunate enough to have an amazing Alpha Pup and an always-amusing, little pack-brother to fill in some of the empty spaces I’ve been feeling lately.  Thank you so much, Sir!  You and Tebow are just cool beans smothered in awesome sauce!

Beware of Owner

Aw... I found a picture of my Owner playing w/ her puppies...

Saturday, April 14, 2012

Froliocn, final part, Saturday night, Dungeons & Drunkards


Up in the room, prepping for the big Saturday night dungeon party, I got into my pup gear – w/ my new hood!  My lovely Owner had decided I’d had enough beatings for the weekend, and was content to just let me pup-out.  Ma’am walked me on-leash around the dungeon in pup-mode for a couple of laps… then the wrestling mats became available.  I got to romp w/ another pup (cute, 25-year-old, Asian twink w/ a never-ending supply of energy).  It was tremendous fun!  While he was a bit stronger than me, I think it was pretty clear that this Irish wolfhound was higher up in the pack order.  He would jump on my back, but I would be able to easily drop and roll us over, putting him on his back and using the momentum to carry me on through the roll back onto my paws, so I could quickly hop back onto him, pinning him down… where I would proceed to lick him all over his face.  :)

Great fun that it was, he is 25, and I am 36… so eventually I was worn down.  I was grateful when another little twink kid came over to wrestle him, and I could just go curl up by Sir (Ma’am had wandered off to go do her social butterfly thing again).

Eventually we all went back upstairs to change cloths and start drinking.  I popped up to my room to change and returned to Sir’s room w/ a drink I was starting and a cookie I was finishing.  Sir’s eyes lit up: “You have cookies!?  Go fetch the cookies!”  LOL.  It was the most assertive command he had given me the entire weekend.  “GO FETCH COOKIES!”

(Do all pups consider cookies a vital part of aftercare?  I had thought that was just me.)

After cookies and drinks, we went to check out some of the room parties and have more drinks.  We ended up stopping in the hotel room of two of the Dominion guys… and that’s when the fire alarm sounded!  We spilled into the hall… and to my surprise and delight, CF and my husband-in-law spilled out of the room next door – which happened to be the Wolf Den (a traditional watering hole at our CAPEX parties).  Sir mentioned that he was hungry, so I brought him to the Wolf Den.  He got some food… and then revealed that he had this secret wish to touch some boobs – just to try it out.  Well, first he tried my wife-in-law’s date.  He had this whole, long spiel: “Hi. I’m gay. It’s been many years since I touched boobs. Yours are very nice. Yadda, yadda, yadda.” 

He tried hers out… and I was like, “Sir, if you wanted touch boobs, then you should have just said something.”  So I just holler at CF (who has some first class knockers) to come over and tell her to remove her shirt, which she does, and Sir gets booby-fondle number two.  The punch line of this story actually comes later when we told Ma’am about it.  Her response: “God damn it! I was lusting after this man for how many years, and well [said to me] first you get him, and now [to CF] he’s fondling your boobs.  This is not fair!”  LOL.

Well, that pretty much does it.  After booze and boobs we drifted out of the Wolf Den, said our goodnights, and staggered back to our respective hotel rooms.  Definitely an all-around excellent con w/ very few complaints!  Ma’am’s birthday present to me was certainly one of my best ever… and that leads me into one important post-Frolicon announcement… which I’ll just save for another post.  Got’a try and keep you folks in suspense, right?

Friday, April 13, 2012

Frolicon, Part 3, Saturday-day, Cum again?


I slept until about 7AM – which is late for me.  Then my Owner invited me into bed… where she proceeded to edge me for half an hour.  It was easy for her to keep me there b/c I hadn’t been given permission to shoot for two weeks.  She then informed me that while technically no longer in service to my Sir-from-yesterday, he was still the only one who might allow me to cum this weekend.  *whine*  So she patted me on the head, told me to go find him, and rolled over and went back to sleep.  *double whine*

I didn’t really know where I might find said Alpha Pup, so I decided to just follow the sounds of people getting hit.  That worked, as I soon found the Alpha Pup DM-ing the early morning spanking party.  I told him what Ma’am had said.  His answer was not promising.  *triple whine*

Then he dropped me into pup mode.  (My favorite thing!)  It was only for like an hour, but it was great!  I really needed puppy time… and his fellow DM was this cute girl w/ gorgeous, long hair who petted me.  As an added bonus to my pup-time, I managed to annoy my wife-in-law’s ex-submissive w/o even trying to.  When I told CF (my Owner’s wife) about it later, she gave me a high five!  Okay, I can accept that really puppy play probably shouldn’t be allowed at a spanking party… but shouldn’t there also be a rule about not allowing into any dungeon neurotics who have more issues than Action Comics?  I’m just say’n…

Leaving the dungeon, Sir led me by leash (My favorite thing!) back to my Owner (who was in her sexy-cool were-tiger costume).  It was now noon, so Ma’am gathered the immediate family for lunch: the Owner, her beautiful wife w/ her husband, and the family puppy.  We swapped more stories of our various activities.  My husband-in-law was spending time hanging w/ a couple of the CAPEX guys… CF was networking and made a date w/ a hot girl… my Owner was... shall we say “collecting” cute boys and girls (when you're a hot-looking, polyamorus, bisexual switch you never need to be lonely)… and I was romping w/ the pups.  Before the Con began, Ma’am had issued a declaration to the family:  “We go to con single.”  LOL.  It was a good strategy; everybody was off having fun.  (Now, if I could just get off…)

After lunch, Ma’am was crashing, so I took her to the room and put her to bed for a kitten nap.  I called Sir and was invited down to his room to hang (they were ordering pizza).  Sir had taken his peeps up to the masturbation party.  He told me that had I been there, he probably would have let me cum.  *Growls w/ frustration* 

So we just hung loose until 5PM when I had to go back up wake my Owner.  The Kitten & I had some PB&J sandwiches and then went down to the vender’s room.  Last year at Folicon I purchased a tail (my first piece of actual puppy gear… despite being a pup for many years), so it was fitting that this year I picked-up a leather puppy hood.  Ma’am bought a couple of things to hurt her pain-puppy with.  I also had the first opportunity to introduce Ma’am to two of the guys I’d met at Dominion.  They were surprised to discover that my thus-far mysteriously absent Owner was female (LOL) but quite cool w/ it.  That was really good, b/c one apprehension Ma’am has had about me spending time w/ the gay pup community is the fear that she wouldn’t be respected… but that hasn’t been the case at all.

Both Ma’am and Sir were interested in a violet wand demo, so that’s where we met back up… but the Kitten was feeling restless (social butterfly), so we left early.  We socialized some in the hallways before heading back up to our room to dress for the big dungeon party. 

To be continued...

Thursday, April 12, 2012

Chick-fil-A Drag Queens

This is for Tebow...

Frolicon, Part 2, Friday, My day in service


I’m a morning person.  This sucks at Con, b/c it means that even when I go to bed at 1:30AM I still wake up about 5:30.  *Grrr*  I stay on the floor and play on my computer until I hear my Owner and her wife are waking up around 8.  The three of us share stories of our adventures of the previous evening… and we agree unanimously that Ma’am wins the prize for “slutting-it-up.”  I grab a shower, and as I come out the ladies see Sir’s bite marks all over me.  I think their reaction was something like: “Jesus Christ!!!”  (Well, it was Easter…) I explained that Sir was just trying to make my red poison ivy rash blend in by turning the rest of me colors.

Before leaving the room, I goofed-up and said to my Owner, “I’m about to let you lock my collar on me.”

“LET me?” she asks… and when a correction doesn’t quickly come, she punches the shit out of a bruise from where Sir has already bit me repeatedly… AND tells me that I have to ask Sir to punish me too.  (Apparently serving two dominants means I get punished for everything twice.  Have these people never heard of double jeopardy!?)  At 9:45 I scamper down to the lobby to report to my prearranged Sir-for-the-day.  My punishment comes swiftly in the form of being forced to sit through the most boring 10AM class in con history.  It was just… painful.

Next stop was the vender’s room where Sir purchased some new toys… and informed me of his plan to experiment by Florentine flogging dragon tails on me.  *sigh*

As the morning progressed I found myself feeling a bit dizzy/faint.  I didn’t sleep much, was taking an ongoing beating/bighting, and I realized that I hadn’t eaten an actual meal in too long.  Sir took me up to the con suite where I shoveled away some food and hydrated.  I started feeling less shaky, but still felt like I needed some more sleep.  I finally managed to convince Sir that a nap would be a good idea.  This, however, is where I discovered that “nap” doesn’t mean the same thing to the Alpha Pup as it does to the rest of us.  “Nap” does mean we go to bed… it does not, however, imply that anything restful will happen there.  So, yeah, after a couple of hours of “napping” we both needed a shower, and I was no closer to feeling rested.

About this time Sir’s beagle-pup/boy arrived (he was away for the morning taking care of vanilla business), and my Owner called to invite us all out to lunch together.  The beagle joined us, but Sir decided that he needed to grab a couple of hours of sleep.  *rolls eyes*  (I’d have hit him, but… well, I want to keep all my limbs.)  I was glad his beagle joined us – he’s a great kid!  My family and friends all found him absolutely adorable.  I’m rather fond of him too; he’s like having a kid brother… but better, b/c I can make out w/ him.  ;)

Next on the schedule was the men-only play party.  It was a rather sparsely populated, low-key event… but Sir did get to try his Florentine dragon tail experiment on me… and nobody lost an eye!  (Him: “They said it couldn’t be done!”  Me: “No, Sir, they said it shouldn’t be done.”)  The flogging was great (My favorite thing!)… but then I really wanted to pup-out.  Traditionally, Ma’am would put me in pup-mode at Frolicon for several hours during the day – leading me around by leash to classes, events, or parties.  (My favorite thing!)  I love floggings and beatings, but I was definitely feeling an urge to be on all fours.  Of course, I could have just ASKED, and I’m pretty sure Sir would have dropped me into pup-mode… but… well…  *shrug*

We left the men-only party, and Sir took his crew out for dinner while I was at last given leave to go grab a couple of hours of sleep.  It was about 8:00PM when I reach our room… and arrive just as my Owner is finishing up w/ another boy of hers.  They finished up, and cleared out, and I hit the floor for a two-hour power nap.

So I woke at 10PM, called Sir, who was making his way back from dinner.  We met-up in the lobby… and decided to skip the Friday night dungeon party, as the line to get in was already out the door.  Instead he took us up to his room where he tortured the beagle for a while.  Other friends came and went from the room…  Eventually the three of us had the room to ourselves and some more intimate time.  I was a little worried that I was intruding on them (it felt very voyeuristic – hot, but kind of intrusive), but they didn’t show any signs that I was unwanted, and, well, I was still in-service to Sir, and he hadn’t dismissed me.  So I stayed w/ the two of them for a while… until about 2AM, when I said my good nights and headed up the three flights to my family’s hotel room.  (Thank you again, Sir, for letting me be yours for the day!)

When I arrived in our room, CF (my wife-in-law) invited me into bed to snuggle.  I was there approximately 12 seconds when Ma’am came through the door w/ another boy she picked-up and unceremoniously ordered us both off the bed.  (There’s a reason why Ma’am was once awarded the title of official Dragon*Con sex kitten.)  I let CF have the yoga matt I was using to sleep on, and I curled-up on the carpet… and quickly went to sleep (despite some wild monkey sex going on in that room).  By this point I was seriously horny… but also seriously tired-out!  And we still had a full day of Con ahead of us!

To be continued…

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Froliocon, Part 1, Thursday night, Welcome back!


So let’s start w/ the pre-con curse.  I seem to have this luck that every year, a few days before a big con, something crappy will happen to potentially rain on my parade.  Often it’s been a severe cold – yeah, I’ve frequently been the bringer of the con-crud.  One year it was an infected bug bite that turned into an unattractive skin rash.  This year: an ugly, itchy poison ivy rash right smack on my belly.  :(

*sigh*  Well, what are you gon’na do? 

Go have fun anyway!  I was highly excited about this con b/c of the birthday present my Owner had arranged for me.  She had arranged for me to be in service all day Friday to an Alpha Pup I’ve been crushing on since… well, since last year’s Frolicon when he was “kind” enough to provide my birthday spankings (which he multiplied by seven to do it in dog years… I’m pretty sure he was supposed to divide by seven to get my equivalent dog age, but I was not in any position to argue the point then.)

I made good time driving to Atlanta, Thursday, despite a patch of hail and a tornado warning.  My Owner had already gone down and checked in.  I arrived at the hotel early, but it took me a good 10-15 minutes of continuous re-dialing to get my Owner on the phone so she could tell her puppy/pack-mule were to schlep all of our luggage up to.

Next, I had to go get registered b/c I was due to DM the dungeon party in like half an hour.  I hear that in general registration went very smooth this year.  I’m glad… however, that was not my experience.  They lost my name, and b/c my wife-in-law bought the passes they needed her to come get my badge for me.  So I was in the lobby for a good 30+ minutes of more continuous re-dialing, trying to get either my Owner or her wife on the phone.  It was a bit frustrating, but eventually I got word to the ladies and they came and collected my badge for me.

Fortunately, it turned out that we had plenty of DMs for that first shift at the party, and so I wouldn’t be needed until the next shift started in half an hour.  So I left the dungeon to go wander… and ran into my Sir-for-a-day and his pup/boy.  We chatted for a bit before I led them off to the dungeon – them to play and me to DM.

I was a bit apprehensive about DM-ing Frolicon b/c there are so many novice players at this event (and some folks who forget to kink before they drink), so it keeps the DMs on their toes.  No sooner did I arrive than my wife-in-law was in need of stopping a scene b/c some little newbie boy was flogging his poor play partner in the neck and face and kidneys…  CF (that would be my wife-in-law) scared the little boy so bad when she stepped in that he scampered off and left his toys behind.  We all got a tremendous laugh out of that.

We had a pretty good play-party going for a Thursday night, and the con was off to a good start.  At one point, CF was talking to a straight friend of hers who glanced over her shoulder and rolled his eyes.  “Well, there it is!” he flatly declared, “The first man-on-man kiss of the con!” 

CF turned and looked… and busted out laughing.  “That’s my wife’s puppy,” she explained.

“Oh,” he says.  “Um… that’s cool.”

LOL.  Yeah, after my shift had ended (10:30) I found a very cute beagle-boy and, we were snogging in the dungeon.  (My favorite thing!)

I think it was around 11:30 when I went upstairs w/ Sir and his beagle to visit the “cops & robbers” theme party.  Once there, Sir proceeded to engage me in one of the hottest make-out sessions of my life!  It consisted of a mixture of passionate kissing (Wow! Can that Alpha Pup kiss!) and serious bighting (My favorite thing!).  We were both leaning up against a wall and going at it so intensely that I literally went all wobbly in my legs.  I just sank to the floor at Sir’s feet and hugged his leg.  I think I stayed like that for a while in a very spacey, happy head-space...

After midnight I followed Sir back to his hotel room for a little more making-out (this time w/ his boy/pup included in a three-way clinch).  I finally left them and headed back to my own family’s room about 1:30-ish in the morning.  I made my bed on the floor (I’m not allowed to sleep on furniture), and turned-in.  My lovely Owner showed up some time later, after having a rather amorous evening of her own w/ a girl and a guy that she met.  Welcome to Frolicon, folks!

To be continued…

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Service Puppy... or Service vs. Puppy


Last night, my Owner’s wife posed me a question:  How come I rarely ever pup-out at our home BDSM group?  I mean, I am a pup.  Pup play is my favorite thing! (See previous post for reference.)  I love to pup-out when I go to other clubs or venues or kinky cons… but at my home club it’s pretty rare to actually see me on all fours barking and chasing balls.  So my wife-in-law asked me why that is.

At first I couldn’t really come up w/ a reason.  Then my Owner (always insightful) provided us w/ the answer.  When I pup-out it’s a completely free and relaxed mindset.  When I’m attending my home club I always feel (as mentioned previously) “on duty.”  It’s hard for me to pup-out b/c I feel like I need to be on-hand for whatever might need to be done.  It’s probably a completely false perception on my part.  I mean, there’s nothing written in stone that says I have to volunteer or be ready to offer advice or take over as social director while a board member goes for a smoke…  But by now it’s habit.  And, of course, I enjoy helping out!  I take great pride in my home group and like to do whatever I can to make each event run smooth.  I am a service-pup after all.

When I’m away at another venue, I feel like I’m free to drop to all fours and romp about.  But… I think I’m going to make it a resolution to try to pup-out more frequently while at home.